And just like that, there ends my first term at St Aldates Oxford. To be honest it feels weird being back home, I've gotten pretty used to being around people again having lived in a house with 11 other interns for 3 months. I may not physically be all that far away from number 9, but my life there feels worlds apart from my life back home. Covid-19 has all but destroyed any hope I had of a somewhat normal year, but looking back I think I can honestly say that 2020, at least for me, has in a weird way been a lot better for it. I don't want to downplay the severity of the situation, as of writing this update this virus has killed an unfathomable 1.7 million people worldwide, it's a disaster unlike any most of us have or will see again in our lifetimes. The pandemic has, however, provided the impetus for some pretty dramatic life changes, all of which (at least for me) probably turned out for the better.
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| (Covid compliant - we live together) picture of the 2020/21 School of Ministry interns |
I'm sorry I haven't been more active in updating you guys how I'm doing, to be honest placement stuff has been pretty quiet ever since lockdown 2 happened, and other stuff has been going really well, but is pretty hard to convey in words. Suffice to say God is present, and He's been shaking things up in a pretty big way.
I was going to write some sort of big thing here about how stuff has been going but it's not really working, so instead I'm gonna share a little year in review type reflection I did about a week ago, it's just a series of questions, and my responses, but I hope it'll help to provide a bit of insight into where I'm at:
What’s been hardest? Probably watching every significant
thing I had to look forward to this year get cancelled one after another with
no sign of an end to Covid
What surprised you the most? Looking back, I can honestly
say I don’t miss any of it. I guess it just goes to show that even in all the
crappy situations we’ve been thrown into this year, God is still working, and
His plans are far greater and better than any of our human ones
What are you thankful for? So much stuff. Incredible
friends, particularly Anna, Ellie, Elise, James, the Academy and every single
one of the Aldates interns. I’m thankful for God and His plans for my life, and
as backwards as it sounds I’m thankful for Covid, without which, even though
it’s completely terrible, there is absolutely no way I would be where I am
right now as the cancelling of all my plans for this year provided the impetus
for me to do something totally different with my life
Where did you fail? What did you learn? If I failed anywhere
this year it was in not getting where I wanted to with the puppet team back in
February, and also in trying to invest so much into so many different
friendships I ultimately didn’t end up properly investing in any of them as I
just simply spread myself too thinly. It’s been a bit of a wake up call for me
about intentionality
What’s been disappointing? See “What’s been hardest” but also not really getting a chance to say goodbye to people properly
Where have you been stretched? Where have you grown? Aldates
SoM, in many many ways…
What have you learned? People don’t see me how I see myself, I’m actually pretty outgoing in community
What have you been encouraged by? What should you celebrate?
God continues to move visibly in my life, which has been pretty incredible, and
I’m surrounded by so much support I frankly don’t feel like I really deserve
Where do you see blessings from waiting? From struggle? Covid cancelled all my plans for this year, but put me in a place where I'm able to do School of Ministry, which has been such an incredible blessing
Whom or what have you invested in? Being really intentional
with how and who I spend time with at Aldates SoM, and the friendships I have made there, and also not falling into the same pitfalls from my time at university
How have you seen God at work? Literally everywhere in my life this year, but particularly over the last three months He has really shown up and challenged me on some pretty deep stuff
What might be on God’s heart for you this next year?
Spiritual growth and character growth
What are your big priorities for the year ahead? Really
invest more in the postgrads community and the people there
Is there an area of your character God may want to grow?
Proactivity, God seems to have something of a sense of humour putting an intern (me) who in the past has really benefitted from structure in a placement that kind of runs itself if I let it, and I've been very much challenged on that this term
Are there some key people you want/need to spend more time
with? My roommate Joel, as well as my postgrads small group and the postgrads group leaders, covid rules permitting
What spiritual and life rhythms do you need to get in place?
Spiritual disciplines, particularly prayer, but also solitude and silence, and being comfortable with finding a balance for those things in the context of community
All of this really only scratches the surface of how I've been doing the past three months, God has been working in me in a big way and I really don't know how to put that in writing. I attempted to do it in a 2600 ish word report I wrote on the discipline of simplicity about a month ago, but I still don't really feel like I got anywhere with putting it in writing, so I apologise for that. I'll spare you of that as it's pretty long but suffice to say things are going well, and there is a lot more for God to do yet!
Thank you to everyone who has been praying for me, even if most of you don't quite know what you're praying for! You're all amazing.
